Wile E. Coyote seconds before his untimely and ironic death.
Wile E. Coyote seconds before his untimely and ironic death.

Albuquerque, NM — In recent years there have been a number of cancer researchers that died shortly after making major discoveries. The same has happened to many holistic medicine researchers. It was just a matter of time before a celebrity died during research.

Wile E. Coyote, former road runner chaser turned scientist, was found dead outside of his cancer research lab yesterday. He had been crushed to death by a falling anvil.

The day before his death it was reported that Coyote had made a major breakthrough in cancer treatment, using ground up road runner beaks, he found they attacked tumors with little side effects.

This excerpt was taken from a recent Gish Gallop interview with Coyote.

“Well I gave up chasing the road runner at age 40, call it my mid-life crisis,” said Coyote. “I found a higher calling where I could put my genius to work benefiting others. Road runner beaks being the medicine are a mere coincidence”.

Police have no witnesses or leads at this time.

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