Montoursville, PA — At a recent campaign stop in Pennsylvania, President Donald Trump went off script. During a lengthy tirade about Iran and former Secretary of State John Kerry to comment about the Green New Deal and the conditions of our oceans.

“Air goes up, water runs down, they just let it go to waste,” said President Trump moments after accusing the Obama Administration of shipping Iran over 1 trillion dollars in cash.  “I mean what are they even doing out there?”

In recent days, several members of the United States House of Representatives including Speaker Nancy Pelosi accused the president of being mentally unstable. Pelosi’s comments stung Mr. Trump, in particular, leading to a series of tirade tweets accusing the Speaker of being crazy and unable to control her hands.

Iran on President Trump’s Mind

More peculiarly, in a press conference designed to highlight a recent bill to give financial relief to American farmers in lieu of recently imposed Chinese tariffs, President Trump switched gears again and attacked Iran.

“Look,” exclaimed President Trump gathering his thoughts with several farmers behind him. “Iran–and a lot of you people don’t think I know this, but I know this very well–Iran is easy because you know what? We know, they and we know and the people. Look, people before knew about it, too, but they didn’t do anything about it, but it’s not something they can really do, only smart people can, and I can do it, which is solar and wind that doesn’t kill eagles like the liberals set up.”

After briefly explaining how the 16 billion dollars would be paid for by the Chinese, despite the fact that tariffs are paid for by the American consumer, the president launched into a lengthy discussion about how California “throws people in jail for killing birds” among other topics.

Treasonous Bald Eagles?

“You can even go to jail in California for killing a bald eagle with a windmill,” continued Mr. Trump despite confused looks from his staff. “And Hillary. Let me tell you. Treason they say. And I know what I’m talking about. There’s going to be some jail time. Believe me.”

Upon leaving the press conference, Iowa farmer Dustin Baylor expressed concern that the president didn’t understand the plight of the American farmer.

“I’m not so sure President Trump gets it,” said Mr. Baylor scratching his head outside the White House. “We’re about to go under and I need to fix my tractor with this money. Everyone around me is deep financial trouble. I’ve 75% of my crop now sitting in storage and if I can move it, even with this money from the government, we’re finished.”

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