A year-long study by the Palo Alto, CA-based Rundex Family Foundation has revealed that male Donald Trump supporters have, on average, a penis that is 2 inches shorter than non-Trump supporters.
Cattle in Nebraska have formed a coalition against being bred and slaughtered for food. They call themselves Antifarm and are backed by PETA and funded by the George Soros Foundation, which has recently received a mysterious $18 billion cash infusion.
The San Francisco Unified School District announced plans to rename all its schools with a gender-neutral, non-controversial name.
Historians from Brigham Young and Southern Methodist Universities have discovered that the quaint former gold rush town of Nevada City, California is actually a set from a lost Star Trek episode. The researchers made the discovery while digging through the Paramount television archives in Burbank, CA.