California Governor Jerry Brown seen here in front of a Irvine, CA In-n-Out burger commemorating LGBT Pride Month.
California Governor Jerry Brown seen here in front of a Irvine, CA In-n-Out burger commemorating LGBT Pride Month.

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Irvine, CA — At a grand opening of an In-n-Out burger in Irvine this morning, California Governor Jerry Brown unveiled an LGBT Pride version of the State’s flag. The event, which is supposed to coincide with the State’s June celebration of LGBT pride month, was co-opted by the Governor to help push the entire LGBT agenda forward.

Our nation was founded on the principle of equal rights for all people,” said Governor Brown speaking in front of the In-n-Out Burger, “but the fulfillment of this promise has been too long in coming for many Americans. Some of the most inspiring moments in our history have arisen from the various civil rights movements that have brought one group after another from the margins to the mainstream of American society. And as far as I’m concerned, nothing says American values like a Double-Double Animal-Style,” continued Mr. Brown speaking of an In-n-Out “secret menu” favorite.

The event did not go without controversy, as the 4 time governor chose one of the most conservative parts of the state to celebrate LGBT diversity.

“I don’t know why these people need a special anything, let alone a whole month,” said Newport Beach┬áresident Keith Grounds who was exiting the drive-thru. “I mean, I leave them alone, and they should leave me alone, you know? I don’t need all these gay people shoving their lifestyle down my throat.┬áI’m sick of it. And I’m sick of Jerry Brown, too, pandering to these people. He needs to be worrying about our budget, not these buggernuts.”

According to a spokesperson for the famous hamburger chain, the governor’s visit and actions were unannounced and unplanned.

“We had no idea the Governor was planning on doing such an event,” said In-n-Out Burger Director of Communications Bethany Millbright. “Obviously we were surprised, but we didn’t interrupt him. We’re just happy he complimented our restaurant, although technically there is no such thing as an animal-style Double-Double. Or anything remotely resembling a ‘secret’ menu.”

According to customers, the flag was later quietly removed from the property and returned to Sacramento.