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October, 2021

Advice

Asperger’s Support Group Meeting Awkwardly Silent

A weekly support group meeting of Asperger's patients was awkwardly silent for the 6th straight week according to participant Don Bessert of Plymouth, MA.

Dog in a Hot Summer Car? Here’s What to Do

Gish Gallop offers these tips if you see a dog driving a car. Remember stay calm and follow these easy steps and everything will be fine.
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Babylon Bee Announces Anti-Masturbation App

Christians have new hope for a current "hand-demic."

Online Ads for Giant Black Clocks Target Area Woman

Elaine Odell of Beaverton, OR wonders if she inadvertently answered the wrong question.

Satire Publication Cancelled for Writing about Next School Shooting

This ends a long tradition of strong reporting from the Sierra City, CA-based news source.

Idiot Exclaims: “I’m oppressed! Just watch them arrest me for storming the Oval Office.”

He was overheard shouting "Let's go Brandon" moments before being tackled by Secret Service personnel.

Supreme Court Justice Warren Buffett Found Dead

Longtime Supreme Court Justice Warren Buffett has died in his sleep according to the Omaha, Nebraska police department. His death, which comes after the suspicious passing of Justice Antonin Scalia's untimely death, further puts pressure on both President Biden and the Senate to appoint a successor.