January, 2022

Satire

Armored Taco Truck Opens Fire on Citizen Border Patrol: 1 Dead

A shootout between a heavily armed group of citizen border protectors and an armored taco truck left one man dead and several others wounded, according to reports.

Commercial Flights Crash After Air Traffic Control Switch to Irish Accent

New Jersey officials have confirmed at least one crash of a Boeing 757, which fell to the ground shortly after departing Newark, New Jersey.

Biden Offers Laid Off Coal Workers Betamax VCRs

The President's critics say this is another example of him being out of touch with average Americans.

Why I Should Be The Next Supreme Court Justice

There is a lot of controversy going on in our government about the next Supreme Court justice and who should be allowed to choose them. I have a simple solution, choose me.

Native Americans Build Wall Through Arlington National Cemetery

After being betrayed by the Federal government once again, a group of Native American activists are striking back.
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Popular

Supply Chain Issues Linked to Massive Cat Attacks

Department of Defense officials say they are taking "humane steps" to help "mitigate the threat."

Trump Pushes “Eating Your Shit” as Treatment for COVID

In 2020, it was bleach, in 2021, it was horse paste, and now in 2022, it's your piss and shit as "cures" for COVID-19.

CNN’s Dana Bash Still in Sibling Fight Over Childhood Big Wheel

Esteemed CNN Chief Political Correspondent Dana Bash admitted this morning that she is still struggling with her brother over a Big Wheel he received when they were children.

Area Sports Collector Suspicious of Autographed Ball

Area sports memorabilia collector and owner of Ron's Sports Emporium Ron Jessup has some concerns about a recent baseball brought in by an area man.

FEMA Statement: We’re Fucked

Federal Emergency Management Agency (FEMA) released a statement saying that we're doomed and have no hope.