Category: Satire

"That's where it starts to get creepy," said Dilbert in a brief press conference outside the Martinez courthouse. "Who does that? It makes a house look like a person. Look, I respectfully decline the invitation to join his hallucination. And he needs to stay away from me."

According to a spokesperson for the Rolling Stones, Keith Richards wishes not to be bothered.

After discovering a Chinese-branded version of Skippy peanut butter in the Grass Valley, CA Grocery Outlet, area Trump supporter and occasional restaurant racist Terry Adkinson proclaimed to a largely disinterested collection of shoppers that "this is why America is not great anymore."

After removing his roommates' body hair from the shower drain, Mr. Foresight created "Friendship" bracelets for them.

The truce that Clarkson proposed harkens back to The Christmas Truce, a ceasefire between British and German troops during World War 1.

The controversial apocalyptic Georgia monument proclaiming end-of-the-world scenarios was toppled this past week by a group of leftwing activists.

Some analysts close to this emerging market question the timing of the merger and its long-term viability and business sense.

The re-elect Desantis campaign jumped into action only to find itself unable to attack the Chinese-Venezuelan athlete.