January, 2022

Regional News

California Driver Licenses To Sport Rainbow Overlay

California announced yesterday that it will allow applicants to choose a "rainbow overlay" option for their driver's licenses. The new option is slated to be available sometime in August 2016.

House Republican Doug LaMalfa to Seek Food Stamps

California District 1 Republican Doug LaMalfa apparently has had a change of heart on his relatively recent vote to cut USDA Food Stamp funding after it was revealed that he has applied for the program.

New DMV Photo System Promises Faster/More Hideous Pictures

The California Department of Motor Vehicles announced a new photo identification system that not only promises a faster and more effective photo process, but also guarantees the it will take the most hideous and unflattering picture of you.

International Boron Appreciation Day Passes Without Notice

International Boron Appreciation Day passed without notice on Wednesday. Officials of the relatively unknown holiday date said there were no parades, no fireworks and certainly no Boron giveaways at participating fast food restaurants largely because none participated.

California to Fine for Recording in Portrait Mode

After an embittered battle that largely split down party lines, the California State legislature has voted to fine mobile phone users who take photographs in portrait mode as much as $47.00 per infraction.
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Damnation Army Seeks Important Satanist Thrift Shopping Demographic

According to a prospectus provided by the Church, their Citrus Heights flagship store has grown by over 400%.

Subaru Announces 2023 Limited Edition Bernie Sanders Outback

Japanese automaker Subaru announced earlier this week that it plans on releasing a limited run of what is tentatively called the Bernie Sanders Outback LE or Limited Edition.

State of Jefferson Website Honored with Layout of the Year Award

The Jurisdiction of the Jefferson State Militia website was nominated last year for its innovative design and faced stiff competition.

Inflation Concerns Drive Motel 6 to Rename to Motel 7

The 56-year-old budget hospitality and lodging chain Motel 6 announced this week that it is going to rename itself given extraordinary inflation and economic pressures.

Mormon Graffiti Saved Man in Idaho Truck Stop

The Mormon church has been around since the mid-1800's by Joseph Smith under questionable pretenses. It has since grown to 14 million members around the world. The Mormons use all manner of recruiting tools to save souls.