“Racists aren’t the real racists. You’re the real racist,” Says Area Racist
Merton Davies knows a racist when he sees one.
Meet The Man Who Coins Odd Prescription Drug Names
Cisplatin Schweitzer of Dayton, Ohio is the man you've never heard about, but chances are you've ingested one of his drugs.
Why You Should ‘Kombucha Douche’ Like Gwyneth Paltrow
According to a contributor on Gwyneth Paltrow's alternative blog Goop.com, you should consider a personal hygiene regime that the actress has used for years: the kombucha douche.
NASCAR Announces Gaytona USA Cup Series 2018
NASCAR is officially announcing plans to move forward with the Gaytona USA National Racing Association -or Gay NRA for short. The move was finalized after Gordon released in a private press conference that NASCAR was making moves to celebrate the gay community by giving them their own racing circuit.
6 Everyday Toothpaste Hacks That Fail to Prevent Mass Extinction
What does toothpaste and mass extinction have in common? More than you think!
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QAnon Struggles to Portray Jill Biden as a Man
The far-right conspiracy group is having trouble libeling and slandering Jill Biden.
Inter-dimensional Vortex Briefly Appears Above Sacramento
Residents of California's State Capital were both terrified and dumbstruck this AM when what appeared to be a replica of Earth appeared in the sky.
Denis Leary to Tour with Newly Discovered Bill Hicks Jokes
American comedian Denis Leary announced that he would embark on his first comedy tour in over 15 years after he recently discovered a vault containing over 3000 unused Bill Hicks jokes.
Area Excavator Guy Exercises His Climatology Know-How
After what can only be called a bark beetle plaque that has killed tens of thousands of drought-weaken trees around California, excavator operator Rob Barrick had a starling revelation: the massive tree die off is mostly due to Chemtrail spraying operations and not the common bark beetle.
Armed Militia Battle Anti-Trump Protesters in Portland
Members of an armed militia group from rural Virginia calling themselves APART, were detained by police over night after the group took it upon themselves to “arrest†and “detain†several anti-Trump protesters from the newly formed activist group “Portland’s Resistance."
