June, 2022

Living

How to Make Fucking Refried Beans, by Loretta Splitair

Your parenting guilt is easily fixed with the following recipe that not only your children will love, but it makes a kick-ass pot of refried beans.

Gish Gallop Review: Finnegans Wake is an Impenetrable Piece of Crap

What's the difference between a pile of dog crap and Finnegan's Wake? You can avoid the dog crap by walking around it. I have to read and review Finnegan's Wake.
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National Security Agency to Issue Press Releases in Haiku

In a surprise announcement, the National Security Agency or NSA will conduct and publish all Press Releases in Haiku according to Deputy NSA for Strategic Communications Ben Rhodes. The move appears to be an effort to make the oft-criticized security agency look hip, modern and less onerous with regards to personal liberty.

Local Schizophrenic Lawyer Sues Self for Fall

Nevada County is about to make legal history as Fernwood Z. Frischland, Esq., filed a civil suit against himself for a nasty fall he suffered in front of his home at 24444 Old Tunnel Road.