May, 2022


Record Store Day Violence Breaks Out Across America

Massive brawls broke out between vinyl enthusiasts and police at several independent record stores Saturday, leaving an embarrassing scar on the 10 year anniversary of ‘Record Store Day.'

Stryper Comeback Tour to Feature Satanic Theme

Popular 1980s Christian Heavy Metal band Stryper announced over the weekend that they are mounting a comeback tour with a what some are calling an ironic twist: a satanic theme.

Donald Trump Claims John Lennon Is His Favorite Band

In an odd and error-laden tweet, President Donald Trump said John Lennon was his favorite 'band."

R. Kelly’s Children’s Album Postponed Until Next Year

A spokesperson for the controversial entertainer R. Kelly says that his upcoming children's album is being postponed until next year.

Area Non-Binary Social Justice Warrior Disillusioned by Trans-Siberian Orchestra

New York City's Amanda Hyman, a self-proclaimed, non-binary Social Justice Warrior, is upset by the lack of actual transgender people in the Trans-Siberian Orchestra. She wants them to take 'Trans' out of their name.


Pink Floyd Reunion Album to Feature Donald Trump Cover

In what has both fans and critics excited, members of the often estranged prgressive/psychedelic rock band Pink Floyd haved announced a reunion tour to support their surprise upcoming album called Tree.

California’s Secret Plan to Turn Texas Blue

A secret document reveals California's plans to make America blue.

Donald Trump ‘Open To The Idea’ Of U.S./Russia Corporate Merger

Alleged billionaire and Republican presidential nominee Donald Trump told reporters this week that he'd be open to a corporate merger between Russia and the United States should he win the election in November.

Area Man Misinterprets Wife’s Request for a Facial

Tustin, CA couple Carolyn and Jarrett Roush had an embarrassing misunderstanding.

First International Bullet Train To Stop Everywhere Except USA

A press release by the United Nations earlier today revealed plans for a global transportation system that runs on a high-speed railway.