Violet Matenapolis

Born Alma Greenwalt in Modesto, California Violet Matenapolis changed her first name after leaving home at the age of 17 to make her debut in Hollywood as a dancer. She fell into journalism by accident when her first husband, newspaper mogul Victor Matenapolis, discovered her scathing review of a play she had auditioned for scribbled on the back of a grocery list and put her to work. 5 years into their marriage, Victor was tragically killed in a freak accident while cleaning the tank of their beloved python, Stella. Her finger relentlessly on the pulse of what's hot in popular culture, Ms. Matenapolis spends the majority of her time hunched in the corner of any drinking establishment that offers "signature cocktails", feverishly hunting down stories from the darker recesses of the internet.
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North Korean Missile Debris Found in Northern California

As major world powers attend an emergency meeting of the U.N. Security Council to address the successful launch of a North Korean satellite this weekend, federal authorities flooded into Nevada County Sunday morning to investigate what is thought to be debris from Supreme Leader Kim Jong-un’s “friendly launch” into space.

Locals and Flatlanders Face Off in a Competition for Shittiest Drivers

In another terse locals against flatlanders debate, the Nevada County Facebook community pages have been heating up over which faction is doing all of the shitty driving in the area, and now the online fracas has spilled into the streets.

Obama Proposes “Leper-like” Colonies For Anti-Vaxxers

In a last minute press conference called to address the recent contagious disease outbreaks, President Obama has proposed a solution to deal with the Anti-Vaccination or Anti-Vax movement.

Gun Violence Caused by Assholes Not the Mentally Ill, Study Claims

A groundbreaking study reveals the true cause of gun violence.

California Proposes Special “Camps” For Anti-Vaxxers

In a last-minute press conference called to address the recent contagious disease outbreaks, California Governor Newsom proposed a solution to deal with the Anti-Vaccination or Anti-Vax movement.

Commentary: Who Do I Have to Blow to Get A Meal Delivered in this Town?

I would happily pay a delivery charge-hell, I’d even tolerate a long wait time if it meant I didn’t have to put on pants, set down my Manhattan, drag my ass downtown, put out my cigarette, and talk to people. I shouldn’t have to talk to people to eat.

Plastic Bag Ban Threatens Garbage Patch Vortex, Organizer Says

Angela Hansen organized the grassroots effort to save the Pacific Garbage Vortex Patch when she realized that the new ban would force local residents to bring their own paper or canvas bags while shopping.

Violet Matenapolis

Born Alma Greenwalt in Modesto, California Violet Matenapolis changed her first name after leaving home at the age of 17 to make her debut in Hollywood as a dancer. She fell into journalism by accident when her first husband, newspaper mogul Victor Matenapolis, discovered her scathing review of a play she had auditioned for scribbled on the back of a grocery list and put her to work. 5 years into their marriage, Victor was tragically killed in a freak accident while cleaning the tank of their beloved python, Stella. Her finger relentlessly on the pulse of what's hot in popular culture, Ms. Matenapolis spends the majority of her time hunched in the corner of any drinking establishment that offers "signature cocktails", feverishly hunting down stories from the darker recesses of the internet.
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