Shady Grove
Shady Grove was born Eugene Wojohouski, May 9th, 1965, in Oyster Bay, Long Island, New York. As a young boy, he had a penchant for shiny objects and colorful stones. His claims of being able to look into the stones and see the future, as well a being able to find buried treasure, were met generally with great skepticism and an occasional tight wedgie. He attended Hicksville High School on Long Island where he excelled at spending the day locked in various school gym lockers, day dreaming, and organizing show tune ensembles with his friends.
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Earth News
Cher To Wed Robert Plant At Westminster Abbey
Cher's longtime publicist announced this morning that Pop Icon Cher and Rock Icon Robert Plant have reserved the Westminster Abbey for their wedding on January 17th.
Living
Colin Kaepernick Converts To Islam
Beleaguered San Francisco 49ers quarterback, Colin Kaepernick just can’t help throwing gasoline onto the fires he starts. After refusing to stand for the Star Spangled Banner before the 49ers, Packers game on Friday evening, Kaepernick unleashed a tirade of hate speech upon America in an exclusive ESPN interview.
Earth News
Keith Richards Found Not Dead in San Francisco Hotel
Emergency personnel were summoned to the posh Bourges Hotel in San Francisco's Fisherman's Wharf District this morning. In an official briefing at 10 am, Pacific time, in the Bourges convention hall, Ms. D’lune spoke through tears to the media.
National News
WikiLeaks: Clintons Purchase $200 Million Maldives Estate
This afternoon, WikiLeaks says sources in the Clinton Foundation inadvertently leaked the details of a secret deal with Christie's International Real Estate in New York.
National News
Orlando Toddler Dyes In Hot Car
As if the city of Orlando hasn't been challenged enough the last few days, what with a terrorist attack and a gator snatching a toddler from its family, now a third tragedy rears its ugly head.
Popular
QAnon Struggles to Portray Jill Biden as a Man
The far-right conspiracy group is having trouble libeling and slandering Jill Biden.
Inter-dimensional Vortex Briefly Appears Above Sacramento
Residents of California's State Capital were both terrified and dumbstruck this AM when what appeared to be a replica of Earth appeared in the sky.
Denis Leary to Tour with Newly Discovered Bill Hicks Jokes
American comedian Denis Leary announced that he would embark on his first comedy tour in over 15 years after he recently discovered a vault containing over 3000 unused Bill Hicks jokes.
Area Excavator Guy Exercises His Climatology Know-How
After what can only be called a bark beetle plaque that has killed tens of thousands of drought-weaken trees around California, excavator operator Rob Barrick had a starling revelation: the massive tree die off is mostly due to Chemtrail spraying operations and not the common bark beetle.
Armed Militia Battle Anti-Trump Protesters in Portland
Members of an armed militia group from rural Virginia calling themselves APART, were detained by police over night after the group took it upon themselves to “arrest†and “detain†several anti-Trump protesters from the newly formed activist group “Portland’s Resistance."
