Seth Johnston

Seth Johnston is a stand-up comedian living off-grid in the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge and, when supplies are low, Portland, Oregon. He observes Nevada County closely by utilizing a variety of remote viewing techniques and files his reports using long distance CB radio. In his spare time he enjoys frantically writing in separate notebooks simultaneously with both hands and also likes to take canoe trips with his dog Chloe. His lifelong dream is to create a new type of math.
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Bernie Sanders Calls for Eco-Friendly Chemtrail Reform

Democratic presidential candidate Bernie Sanders made a surprise campaign stop in Nevada County on Monday afternoon. Sanders visited the area to announce his plan for a more environmentally friendly chemtrails program.

Trump Vows War Against Numbers

Republican President Donald Trump unveiled his most audacious plan yet at a press conference Wednesday night, vowing to wage war on the numbers 0-9.

Staged Mass Shootings on the Rise

Local doomsday "prepper"and gun store assistant manager Jason Dant issued a warning to all citizens of the United States early this week.

Obama Adds Own Face to Mount Rushmore

Construction began this week on a project that will add the likeness of President Obama to the Mount Rushmore National Memorial. It is the first major construction on the iconic monument since 1941.

Vaping Stops Chemtrails, Study Says

Local Sierra Super Stop parking lot orator and ionizing radiation hobbyist Skyy Wolford announced the discovery of a completely safe and effective method for neutralizing the blanket of chemtrails over Nevada County.

General Mills Debuts New Cereal for Truthers

Consumer goods giant General Mills debuted a new breakfast cereal at area Sierra Super Stop locations this week. The new brand, called Truthi-O’s, is the first General Mill’s product marketed specifically to awakened patriot consumers sometimes referred to as “truthers.”

Multiverse Traveler Disappointed to Find Obama in All Realities

Treasurer of the Nevada County Citizens’ Committee on Benghazi and quantum physicist Gregory Whitaker announced a startling scientific breakthrough at a press conference outside his laboratory in Grass Valley early today.

Local Entrepreneur Connects Militants with Snacks

Local aspiring tech entrepreneur and part-time gun show volunteer William Buxley has been looking for an opportunity to disrupt industry through technology. When armed militants took over a federal building at Malheur National Wildlife Refuge in Oregon and then requested that supporters send snacks, Buxley saw an opportunity.

Seth Johnston

Seth Johnston is a stand-up comedian living off-grid in the Arctic National Wildlife Refuge and, when supplies are low, Portland, Oregon. He observes Nevada County closely by utilizing a variety of remote viewing techniques and files his reports using long distance CB radio. In his spare time he enjoys frantically writing in separate notebooks simultaneously with both hands and also likes to take canoe trips with his dog Chloe. His lifelong dream is to create a new type of math.
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