June, 2022

Melvin Hill

My name is Melvin Hill, and I was born on 12/30/1982 in Grass Valley, CA. My favorite snack is a heaping handful of peach jellybeans. When I'm not rocking out to the easy-listening saxophone jams of my favorite artist, Kenny G, I like to pop in the classic Jimmy Buffett Album, Living on the edge. I am a lifelong Nicolas Cage fan, and my favorite scene from The rock is when Nicolas Cage looks directly into the camera and says, "I'm going to steal the Statue of Liberty."
5 POSTS

Proud Boys Unable to Replenish MAGA Hat Supplies After TikTok Users Ransack Trump’s Website

According to McInnis, the Proud Boys depend on a steady supply of MAGA hats to ensure non-Aryan women reject them.

Active Shooter’s Killing Spree Tragically Cut Short By Second Active Shooter

A second active shooter thwarted the attempts of a potential active shooter at a Palm Beach Walmart.

State Dept Urges Americans To Flee United States

In a surprise announcement, the State Department is urging Americans to leave the country as soon as possible.

Spicey Tells All: The Mooch CAN Suck His Own !#[email protected]

Newly appointed White House Communications Director Anthony Scaramucci sought to differentiate himself from President Donald J. Trump's former campaign manager Steve Bannon Thursday morning during an interview with the New York Times.

Spicy Tells All: Tiffany Trump Comes Out as Transgender, Triggers POTUS Military Ban

Tiffany Arianna Trump, 23-year-old daughter of U.S. President Donald J. Trump, revealed plans to become a man and join the army during a formal "coming out" ceremony with friends and family Tuesday night at the White House, former press secretary Sean Spicer said this morning.
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Trump Says Burned West Coast Trees Were “Asking for It”

An open mic caught the President speaking about trees.

Elon Musk Mulls Buying And Deleting Facebook

Tech titan Elon Musk made global headlines when he deleted the official SpaceX and Tesla pages from Facebook. Musk clarified he did so because Facebook gives him “the willies.

Republicans Take Aim at Health Care

Pew-Pew! Will it be hit or miss this time?

Sharia-based Community Left Unscathed by Hurricane Dorian

One South Carolina Muslim community believes that God spared them from Hurricane Dorian's fury.

Queen Stuns Private Buckingham Palace Audience With 16 Minute Sitar Jam

According to reports from inside Buckingham Palace, Queen Elizabeth II of England surprised a private gathering today when she played 3 songs on the sitar.