James Schlarmann

Comedian, writer, founding contributor of The Political Garbage Chute, holder of zero world records or lifetime achievement awards.
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Donald Trump Claims 10 Billion Illegal Immigrants Voted For Hillary Clinton, And That He Has Cured AIDS

In a blast of tweets Sunday afternoon, President-Elect Donald Trump raised eyebrows all over the country by seemingly implying that the election he himself won was fraught with voter fraud.

Wayne LaPierre Tragically Shoots and Kills Thoughts and Prayers

Law enforcement authorities in Virginia this morning announced that they'd responded to a 911 call late Wednesday night that came from the residence of NRA Executive Vice-President Wayne LaPierre. He tragically shot and killed "thoughts and prayers" on his property.

Oregon Militia Squatter Explains Why Colin Kaepernick Hates America

Earlier this year, Oregon First Militia Private Corporal Master Chief Grant Ryan participated in a standoff between federal authorities and members of a posse headed by Ammon Bundy. Bundy is a rancher and the son of Cliven Bundy, another man who led an armed standoff with federal agents in Nevada.

House Introduces Universal Background Checks For Porn Purchases

Citing his party's newly leaked platform, Speaker of the House Paul Ryan (R-WI) says he will allow a vote on a bill that his Republican caucus has drafted which would create a federal universal background check before purchasing any pornographic content.

Former Cellmate to Auction George Zimmerman’s Prison Dildo

Though he's a free man now, for several months George Zimmerman was in jail while he stood trial for killing Trayvon Martin. One of the men who spent time in the same cell as Zimmerman will auction what he calls a "prison dildo" the two shared.

Sean Spicer: Obama Administration Didn’t Fully Vet The People Trump Hired

White House Press Secretary Sean Spicer made head turn yet again today when he said that it has “become increasingly clear” since the Trump administration took power in January that the previous administration did a “Russian piss-party-poor job” of vetting them.

Republican Angry That Civil War Reenactor Who Played Abe Lincoln Not Actually Honest Abe

HOBART, ARKANSAS -- Clem O'Connell is furious, and he's writing to every newspaper editor, his congressmen, and even President Barack H. Obama to air his grievance. O'Connell recently attended a Civil War...

Donald Trump Floats Putin As “Pinch-President”

RNC Chair Ronna Romney McDaniel told reporters about the email this morning, and she said that the email has left her "in quite a bind."

James Schlarmann

Comedian, writer, founding contributor of The Political Garbage Chute, holder of zero world records or lifetime achievement awards.
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