As the final ear-bleeding refrains of Paranoid came to a close at Birminghamâ€™s Genting Arena, Christians around the world breathed a collective sigh of relief. After nearly a half century of turning Americaâ€™s youth onto the occult, heavy drug use and sexual perversion, it finally signaled The End of Black Sabbath.
The Toyota Motor Corporation reportedly struck a 10-year sponsorship deal with the Islamic State (ISIS,ISIL), aligning themselves alongside the world's leading global terrorist organization.
A self-proclaimed group of "patriots" known as APART (Armed Patriots Against Radical Terrorists), took it upon themselves to hang their own banner on Lady Liberty reading 'GTFO' (acronym for Get the F*ck Out) early Wednesday morning.
The national #HeadOut campaign, funded and presented by Brownstar Insurance, made a stop at the Grass Valley Public Library this week to show both new and experienced drivers the dangers associated with road head.
Residents are advised to wear masks, however, due to confirmed law enforcement reports that Antifa Space Force will be utilizing aerial surveillance satellite footage
Organizers say they're making some adjustments for next year's event.
Area Flat Earth believer Ben M. Walkowiaksky believes that his new Facebook nickname "Flattard" might be a derogatory slur. Mr. Walkowiaksky was christen "Flattard Supreme" by the administrators of the popular Flat Earth Facebook Group "Flat Earth Education" over the weekend.