July, 2022

Dr Hooss

Dr Hooss was the worlds first successful test tube abortion way back in 1487, inventor of the underwater unicycle and the worlds first lighter than air brick. Was the first man to ever wade the English channel, holds the world record for fastest jog to the moon and back and is winner of lying bastard of the year 6 years straight from 1924 through to 2038.
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Satirist Tragically Mistaken for Whistle Blower

Last Saturday satirist Harry Kellop was shot dead in a friends doorway in Ullapool by what is believed to be a professional hit.

UK Birds Fuming Over Austerity

Birds across the United Kingdom have taken-up smoking to reduce hunger pains caused by the government's recent austerity measures.

Flaccid Men’s Rights Activist Should Have Taken the Blue Pill

The Blue Pill would have helped a Newcastle Mens Rights Activist keep his tassel at attention.
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San Francisco Renames Schools After Uncontroversial Alameda, CA Woman

The San Francisco Unified School District announced plans to rename all its schools with a gender-neutral, non-controversial name.

Area Home Gardener Harvests $7.56 Tomato

Area home gardener Herman M. Dean has been working all summer in his garden and announced to friends and family that he harvested his first tomato. A tomato estimated to cost $7.56 to produce.

Historians: Nevada City, CA Actually an Old Star Trek Episode Set

Historians from Brigham Young and Southern Methodist Universities have discovered that the quaint former gold rush town of Nevada City, California is actually a set from a lost Star Trek episode. The researchers made the discovery while digging through the Paramount television archives in Burbank, CA.

Start-Up Facing Backlash over Patented Spider Air Filters

Texas start-up Breathe-Clean has come under fire for it's SpiderEasy of hypoallergenic air-filters which feature live genetically modified arachnids who, in the words of company spokes person Bethany Millbright "eat the particles that humans can't see."

Porn Version of “Left Behind” Less Amusing Than Original

A pornographic version of the popular 2014 Christian end times film Left Behind ironically is less amusing than the film it sets out to mock.