July, 2022

Cecilia Ravenscroft

Cecilia Ravenscroft is a writer who writes writerly. She has survived four husbands, keeping the last name of her second husband because it was cool (even if he himself wasn’t). Her current husband might still be alive, but she is afraid to pry the remote from his hand to find out. She is currently writing writerly things when she isn’t writing anything else.

Portland Man Sent to ER After Asking for Sandwich

Jake Mooney of Portland, Oregon found himself in the Emergency Room this past week after asking his now former girlfriend to make him a sandwich.

Antifa Declares IPO, Listing On NYSE

NYSE officials have yet to decide on a ticker symbol.

Winterfell Announces ‘Starkbucks’ Franchise After Viral Launch

Winterfell is getting into the coffee aftermarket.

Feminine Workplace Metaphors Cause Discomfort for Men

Cocoa, FL – Jim Stephens, a sales admin at...


Literate Area Author Inserts Facebook Typos Just to “Fit In”

A burgeoning Nevada City author admitted today to a small group of his friends that he often inserts typos and other usage errors into online Facebook comments just to "fit in." Area writer and part-time poet Roy Riffle made the admission to his small author's group while they were enjoying street tacos at Nevada City's popular Mi Pueblo Taqueria on Union Street.

Saint Bernard Condemns ‘Morning After’ Dog Biscuit

Employing some of his most conservative rhetoric to date, Saint Bailey Bernard of Holy Southern Shepherd Church released a statement regarding the controversial morning after dog biscuit.

Serial Deviant Arrested Again in Wisconsin

A Wisconsin man with a long history of sexually abusing horses was recently arrested AGAIN by the Brown County Sheriff’s Office, for you guessed it, sexually assaulting horses.

Study: Cell Towers Kill Zika And West Nile Virus Mosquitoes

A massive two year study conducted by the Palo Alto-based Rundex Family Foundation and sponsored by the Centers for Disease Control's (CDC) National Toxicology Program (NTP) has determined that modern cell phone towers can deter and some cases kill mosquito disease vectors.

Obama Denounces “Racist” Foods

President Obama has stepped into a bit of a quagmire today. Some of the reporters present at an impromptu press briefing were amazed. All of the reporters were shaking their heads.