Cleveland, OH — Cleveland’s Lawrence family dog Smee has undergone a new revolutionary and controversial treatment: they circumcised him. The new procedure is aimed to ease the minds of families wanting to get rid of the “red rocket” that could raise some uncomfortable questions from young children.

Sierra Lawrence, Smee’s owner, spoke to Gish Gallop about the circumcision.

“Smee has always been a little different. He only eats kosher food and wears a yarmulke on most days,” said Sierra. “He always looked sad when he licked himself, so we figured we might as well circumcise him, it took a while to find a willing Rabbi.”

The procedure was done by Rabbi Ezekiel Stein. He said, “It was…. different from saying the least. Normally my clients are infants or the occasional porn actor, but a dog? Maybe I found a new niche for my business.”

After the procedure, Smee has been the talk of the dog park. All of the dogs and people have snuck peeks at Smee. One of the women was overheard, wishing her husband would get circumcised.

According to the Lawrence family, Smee has become a much happier dog. He makes eye contact and isn’t as moody. He thanked his family by spelling out “Shalom” in his food bowl. The family says that the only downfall is that Smee spends most of his time licking himself.

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