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Ted Cruz to Star in Next Batman Movie

According to Hollywood insiders, Presidential hopeful and Tea Party favorite Senator Ted Cruz has announced a multi-year contract with Warner Brothers Picture to star in as many as 3 Batman films as "the Penguin."

Hate Group Fails to Expand Support With LGBTQ Robes

The hate group is considering its options after its failed outreach program.
A Kent, Washington man brought back an unwelcome souvenir from a recent Las Vegas business trip.

Man with Chlamydia Discovers What Happens in Vegas Doesn’t Stay in Vegas

A Kent, WA man has learned the hard way not to trust marketing slogans. 38 year old married father of 2 Jimmy Fostersen recently attended his company's annual convention in Las Vegas, Nevada.
President Trump hinted that secret documents might be stored at Area 51.

Trump Hints That Obama’s Real Birth Certificate Stored at Area 51

President Trump hinted that secret documents might be stored at Area 51.

Tiger Woods Threatens Lawsuit Over Grass Valley Mural

What was designed to be a local tribute to our community's appreciation for American heroes and tolerance for racial diversity has become a point of heated controversy, not just in the small town of Grass Valley, California, but on the international stage as well.
Paranoia from the right wing about liberal media is growing now more than ever.

Area Man Won’t Be Baited Into Liberal Media

Local Trump supporter and protest attendee, Brandon Whosville--aged somewhere between 18-23 based on vocabulary analysis alone--publicly stated in a Facebook group that, "he wouldn't be baited into making headlines that help the left" referring of course, to the "left wing/right wing" ideology that makes up the structure of modern American politics.
Trump Creates New Line Of Flex Cuffs

Trump Creates New Line Of Flex Cuffs For Police

Trump's cuffs detects prisoner's nationality and turns colors to help authorities identify where an illegal immigrant is from.
If you didn't vote for Donald Trump, or you even look like someone who didn't vote for him, he plans on suing you.

Donald Trump Threatens to Sue ‘Any American’ That Didn’t Vote for Him

The billionaire real estate mogul and former reality-TV star and President of the United States told reporters this week at a press conference held at the White House that he plans on suing anyone who didn't vote for him.

General Store or Someone’s Home: Area Man Unsure

Recent Vacaville, CA transplant Tommy Empire was not sure if the Iowa Hill, CA general store was actually a grocery store or somebody's kitchen.
Keith Bradenshauer of Alta Sierra, CA swears he spotted an enormous "Black Cube" near the moon.

Amateur Astronomer Spots Giant Black Cube Near Moon

Local amateur cryptozoologist, paranormal investigator, SciFi Channel fan and amateur astronomer Keith Bradenshauer of Alta Sierra, CA swears he spotted an enormous "Black Cube" near the moon this past week on his Meade telescope.
Local Success and Productivity Guru Mitch Freed

Area Man Shamelessly Using Inappropriate Google Adwords in Web Articles

A local man has been adding high value Google Adwords into his articles in order to boost his SEO rating in attempts to boost his website advertising revenue.